I decided to make Motherhood and its challenges a series for the Mommy-Talk section so expect more than just a part 2 to my original post ;)
~
I was just lying in bed a minute ago. For the last couple of days I have been feeling like perhaps I should just give up on my dream to make this blog a community for us women.
I have been feeling sorry for myself for having too much on my plate and little time to concentrate on my personal goals and dreams. Interestingly enough... this very same thought, reminded me of what I wanted to talk about in part 2 of my original Motherhood and its challenges post.
Personal Goals and Dreams.
Some may say that their biggest dream was having a family. Getting married and having kids.
I would say that this was my dream too. I remember as a young teenager, I would often talk about my plan to meet a good man, and start a family I would pour my heart and soul into.
Falling in love with "the" guy was the easy part. Once you become a mother, staying on top of things and remembering that this is what you always wanted in life, is a completely different story.
In order to be a good mother, you must understand and be willing to sacrifice anything and everything for your children.
So what happens when you start feeling the need to fulfill your personal goals? To chase after your "other" dreams?
This is what happens...
Out of the blue, you are swamped with mommy things to do. Just when you feel you have time to work on yourself and what YOU want to do, things take a turn and you find yourself buried in mommy things and stuff you need to get done.
It can get frustrating and discouraging. It can seem like you will have to wait until your kids are much much older, before you can start working on your personal achievements.
I know plenty of awesome mommies out there that dream about simple things like being able to work out and take care of their bodies. Getting dressed for the day becomes a luxury when your child is unwilling to nap and you have a long list of things to do for the day.
Motherhood is not easy. It's not for everyone either. It requires a level of dedication and selfless love that's pretty up there.
This doesn't mean you need to be ready to let go of your personal goals and dreams. This just means it will take you a little longer to make them a reality.
When it comes to personal goals and dreams, I think we should pursuit them. The one thing that is important and we must do if we want to survive the ride, is realize that we play a different role in life. We are where we decided to be. We gave priority to what was most important to us in life.
This means, we must stop comparing ourselves to other women who seem to reach their personal goals earlier in life. Every situation is very unique, no matter how much you may think that you didn't do enough to be where you want to be.
Some people have more challenges than others. Some have more/less support than others. Which makes it an unfair comparison to those that can not reach their goals within the same time frame.
If you are a mother and have a family to care for, its unfair for you to compare yourself with those who are single or married with no children.
Same goes if you have 5 kids and you are comparing yourself to someone who only has one or two kids. But maybe the person with 5 kids have family/friends help and the one with two, doesn't. Maybe the young girl next to your house who recently became a mom is having a tough time adjusting, while you already know what you are doing and have a schedule all set for you and your family.
Because every situation is so unique, we must stop comparing ourselves to other women.
Sarah from Memories on Clover Lane said a while ago in one of her posts, that sometimes all it takes to be happy with what you have, is to clean your house.
I love that advice!. Have you ever cleaned your house and it just feels good? You feel happy and things just feel right. I think I took the advice more than just literally cleaning my house.
I took the advice as polishing what I have in my life, which can and will most likely make me feel satisfied and even grateful for the life I have.
A few years ago, a friend of mine often invited me to go out on a girls night out.
She was single and had a very good high pay job. We were good friends, however; often times she would make fun of me for not being able to do as much because of being married and having a child.
I can honestly say that I did enjoy her company BUT... I usually missed my family and couldn't wait to get home to them.
I still remember how good it felt to be home and hug tight my two loves.
Those moments are what reassured me that I was and still am, where I want to be.
I say, work on your goals and dreams. It may take you a little longer to get there but slow and steady is better than never ready.
In the end, at least for me, having a family is the greatest blessing I could have ever asked for.
Personal achievements and life accomplishments mean nothing when you have no one to share them with.
This is the advice I have given myself. This is the advice I want to share with you today.
I would say that this was my dream too. I remember as a young teenager, I would often talk about my plan to meet a good man, and start a family I would pour my heart and soul into.
Falling in love with "the" guy was the easy part. Once you become a mother, staying on top of things and remembering that this is what you always wanted in life, is a completely different story.
In order to be a good mother, you must understand and be willing to sacrifice anything and everything for your children.
So what happens when you start feeling the need to fulfill your personal goals? To chase after your "other" dreams?
This is what happens...
Out of the blue, you are swamped with mommy things to do. Just when you feel you have time to work on yourself and what YOU want to do, things take a turn and you find yourself buried in mommy things and stuff you need to get done.
It can get frustrating and discouraging. It can seem like you will have to wait until your kids are much much older, before you can start working on your personal achievements.
I know plenty of awesome mommies out there that dream about simple things like being able to work out and take care of their bodies. Getting dressed for the day becomes a luxury when your child is unwilling to nap and you have a long list of things to do for the day.
Motherhood is not easy. It's not for everyone either. It requires a level of dedication and selfless love that's pretty up there.
This doesn't mean you need to be ready to let go of your personal goals and dreams. This just means it will take you a little longer to make them a reality.
When it comes to personal goals and dreams, I think we should pursuit them. The one thing that is important and we must do if we want to survive the ride, is realize that we play a different role in life. We are where we decided to be. We gave priority to what was most important to us in life.
This means, we must stop comparing ourselves to other women who seem to reach their personal goals earlier in life. Every situation is very unique, no matter how much you may think that you didn't do enough to be where you want to be.
Some people have more challenges than others. Some have more/less support than others. Which makes it an unfair comparison to those that can not reach their goals within the same time frame.
If you are a mother and have a family to care for, its unfair for you to compare yourself with those who are single or married with no children.
Same goes if you have 5 kids and you are comparing yourself to someone who only has one or two kids. But maybe the person with 5 kids have family/friends help and the one with two, doesn't. Maybe the young girl next to your house who recently became a mom is having a tough time adjusting, while you already know what you are doing and have a schedule all set for you and your family.
Because every situation is so unique, we must stop comparing ourselves to other women.
Sarah from Memories on Clover Lane said a while ago in one of her posts, that sometimes all it takes to be happy with what you have, is to clean your house.
I love that advice!. Have you ever cleaned your house and it just feels good? You feel happy and things just feel right. I think I took the advice more than just literally cleaning my house.
I took the advice as polishing what I have in my life, which can and will most likely make me feel satisfied and even grateful for the life I have.
A few years ago, a friend of mine often invited me to go out on a girls night out.
She was single and had a very good high pay job. We were good friends, however; often times she would make fun of me for not being able to do as much because of being married and having a child.
I can honestly say that I did enjoy her company BUT... I usually missed my family and couldn't wait to get home to them.
I still remember how good it felt to be home and hug tight my two loves.
Those moments are what reassured me that I was and still am, where I want to be.
I say, work on your goals and dreams. It may take you a little longer to get there but slow and steady is better than never ready.
In the end, at least for me, having a family is the greatest blessing I could have ever asked for.
Personal achievements and life accomplishments mean nothing when you have no one to share them with.
This is the advice I have given myself. This is the advice I want to share with you today.
